ATTN8 Endorsed by the Federal Commission of Assigned Meaning (FCAM)

2 09 2009

Back-to-School Sale on Editing Software Yields Bionic Zoom, Transitioning FX for ATTN Franchise

There’s so much to rave about that I don’t know where to start. The return of Andrew. The Maggie Rodriguez variable. The use of the phrase “losing men out there”. Not to mention the eerie M83-inspired base track. This is the Auto-Tune the News of my dreams!

ATTN8 reducto ad absurdum

I'm not one to declare any particular Auto-Tune the News installment to be "the best Auto-Tune the News ever", but this is the best Auto-Tune the News ever. The surprise substitution in the Katie Couric Notebook segment was a great touch for the first Andrew-shorty volley in a long time (I like to imagine that Andrew has been on an Alaskan fishing boat for the summer). My favorite part of Andrew’s duet with Rodriguez---aside from the hilarious F-bomb, of course---was “those geese are cooked\ those geese are cooked, cooked, cooked.\ Wildlife experts and the FAA concur\ those geese are cooked\”. The celebration of the bad-pun minefield that is the web-based content of CBS continues, then. Even the Auto-Tune the News title bars are getting funnier. And Michael Gregory cut his hair. Crazy.  Without further ado, here for your reference (since you can't possibly be seeing this for the first time) is Auto-Tune the News #8:


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A Funny Thing Happened On The Way to Monday’s KenKen Puzzle

25 06 2009

NYT Arts Section Calls Attention to Hyperreality of Fake News

Recognize this anchoress?

Yeah, I didn’t either. How about now?

I know, right?! I totally spent, like, a decade of my life barely tolerating this broad. Now I totally respect her, and I never would’ve even made the connection were it not for this (and, speaking of the NYT, look).

Of course, as we all know, this sort of thing is not exactly unheard of:

But that’s ancient history. Right now, I am totally digging Battista’s deadpan delivery and feature-story inflection while describing the poor customer satisfaction ranking of Prague’s Franz Kafka International Airport, where  passengers are told that their airlines don’t exist, security checkpoints include elaborate oral and written personal interviews, and navigation is hindered by “extremely long corridors leading to dead ends”.

The “Pervatasaurus leerii” and “Despondex” features are much, much funnier, but I posted this one because the person who freaked and tweaked all of the airport signage graphics has my dream job.

Above: LOL @ “Ç” and “Ñ”. Below: Somebody should do something about the “oppressive, impersonal atmosphere”.






Tracy Baby You Crazy I Don’t Know Whut the Hell’s Goin’ On Or Where the Camera Belongs Let’s Go to Nicole

20 06 2009

Auto-Tune the News #5 Rocks False-Start Blog Out of Torpor

Michael Gregory really took it to the next level yesterday with his fifth edition of Auto-Tune the News. Chances are you first caught wind of the phenomenon back when Auto-Tune the News #2 blew up. In case you’re not on board, the installments are funny without being too clever or too silly. And the music is catchy as hell. After I saw #2, I subscribed to the YouTube channel. Now when a new one drops I watch it about thirty times and then I’m invariably in a good mood for the rest of the day. I don’t think I’ve been able to say that about any other content in my entire life ever. Anyway, here’s #5:

One thing that I especially appreciate about these Auto-Tune the News videos is the fact that a transcript of the “lyrics” is always included in the YouTube file information for each clip–in much the same way that a transcript always accompanies the vlog posts of the Couric and Company Notebook, which is the fluff-piece receptacle from which all of the shorty’s footage is lifted. Of course, the segment featuring Katie Couric (who’s looking more like Carrie Fisher every day) was one of #5’s best bits. She has to have seen these by now!

Katie Koo and Evan (sitting in for Andrew, who is on assignment)

But what really blew me away and made me revisit my own blog fail for a new post was how Gregory let #5 disintegrate upon re-entry with the help of some footage from a minor and fleeting Fox Business News transition fiasco that someone had the presence of mind to rip from their TiVo last week. For making the Fox News franchise look silly, a 29. For appearance, a 29. And for brilliant use (five times) of the “Countdown to the Closing Bell” transition graphic and SFX, a perfect score of 30.  The effect is frenetic and chaotic and I totally ate it up with a spoon. I even made a little bit of fan-art:

I’ll try to resurrect this blog (I enjoyed putting this post together), but I’m not making any promises.