Follow-Up Friday

23 10 2009

23 October 09: Carlos Freire’s Head, 2012, “ATTN #9”

At the risk of acting like the aggregate blogger that I pretend not to be, here are a few updates:


1. Made in Brazil added an assertive wrinkle to the ongoing unofficial A|X-Freire ornamental culture study.

Ima trade four houses in for a hotel.

2. Sony Pictures’ blandly-titled promotional YouTube channel “2012theMovie” has been in upload overdrive. There’re a couple of cool CGI featurettes which I really dug and which seem to indicate that the unprecedented CGI work will outshine the inevitably piss-poor plot. Tell that to The Onion.

we had some good times

3.  And finally, there was a slight Auto-Tune the News installment, which I’m not even going to dignify with a screencap. Worst. Episode. Ever.

As always, the suggestive natures of this post’s title, subtitle and internal structure do not in any way represent a commitment on my part to a regular feature.


Headless Clotheshorseman Gives Carlos Freire the A|X

26 08 2009

Recommended for You: People Who Liked Legend of Creepy Shallow Also Liked Ripped van Twinkle

Everyone’s been wondering where Brazilian model Carlos Freire’s head is in the new A|X ad campaign (which you’ve seen by now unless you’re one of those people who doesn’t believe in magazines).

Headless Clotheshorseman 1

Say what you will about over-defined abs (I’m not a fan; I think they make people look like insects), Freire has the most impressive—if hypertrophied—external obliques in the business. My God. They’re gourd-shaped.

It is kinda weird. There’re, like, twenty different proofs featuring Freire that made their way, in some incarnation, into this campaign, and he’s headless in every single one of them (to be fair, I think I remember seeing one in which, like, one-third of Freire’s mouth is visible).

Headless Clotheshorseman 2

The commodification of the male torso continues. Heads just get in the way.

Quiz time! Without typing his name into an image search (or having a gear fetish, which gives you an unfair advantage), do you know which of the Brazilian male model heads below belongs to Carlos Freire?

Hey, mister.

Once you’ve made your selection, hold your computer up to a mirror to see if you were right!